walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
