The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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