If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
