i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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