fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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