You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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