he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
