Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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