remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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