Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
tell me about the eggs
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
