hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize