If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
