So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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