Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
