Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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