i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
