how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
