also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
BRING THE BAGELS
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
