somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize