Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
P.S. I can't hear my feet
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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