LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I miss vodka workout Fridays
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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