O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
