in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Randomize
