I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
