I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
