He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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