I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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