You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
