we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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