Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
