SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
