I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
