I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
