Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
