she was so not down for the gang bang
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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