We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize