You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
