his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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