Just fell off a train. Bad.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
