I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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