he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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