Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
