matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
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