I love black thongs
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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