my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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