Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Randomize
