I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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