So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I forget how to act sober
Randomize