I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize