Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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